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Thread: Bass Jokes borrowed from .....

  1. #16

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    Or...How many guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb?


    5...one to screw it in and 4 to say I could have done it faster and better

  2. #17

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    How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?


    they wouldn't change it, the original bulb makes better light.




    i think i just made that one up....
    let me check......
    yeah, i did...
    joel D.

  3. #18

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    _
    What do u call a man 'getting with' a women whilst holding a bass?
    a roadie!!
    _
    Why are guitarist's and bassist's bad in bed
    Cause they spend hours_twiddling knobs_that do nothing, instead of getting on with it!
    _
    How do you stop a bassist from drowning?
    Take your foot off his head!

    _
    _
    The difference between camels and_ a bassist:??? A camel can work for 30 days without drinking. A bassist can drink for 30 days without working.
    _

    Q.What do you say to a bass player in a famous band?

    _A_"What's your name?"

    _

    Q.How do you occupy a bass_player for hours?

    A.Tell him to tune his own instrument._

    _

    Q. What's the difference between a bass and an onion?

    A. Nobody cries when you chop a bass in half.

    Q: What did the female bass player say when she got pregnant?
    A: "Is it mine"?

    Q. What is the difference between a Bass player and Guitar player?
    A. Two Strings

    Q. Why did the Bass player cross the road
    A. To see his Imaginary Friends.




    _

    Q. What is the difference between a dead dog on the road, and a dead bass player on the road?
    A. There are skid marks in front of the dog.


    Q. What is the similarity between the singer of the worst female band in your area, and a mo-ped?
    A. Theyre both alright for a ride, until your mates find out.


    Q. What do you call a bass player with 2 brain cells?
    A. Pregnant.


    Q. What do you call a bass player, fronting as a drummer?
    A. Artificial intelligence.





    _

    Q. what's the similarity between a bass player and a hoover.
    A. they both suck when you plug them in !!


    Q. what do you do if you see a bassist, covered in blood, crawling around your back yard.
    A. stop laughing and shoot him


    Q.why did the drummer put a pack of bass strings on his dashboard.
    A. so he could park in the disabled lot.


    Q. what is the range of a gibson les paul?
    A. About 25 feet if you have a good arm!!



    Q. what do you call a bass player with half a brain?
    A. Gifted!!

    Q. What is the difference between a bass player and a chiropdodist??
    A. The chiropodist bucks up your feet!!

    Q. How many keyboard players does it take to change a light bulb ???
    A. Just the one, but he stands holding the light bulb in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.




    Q. How do you know when there's a singer at the door?
    A. He picks the wrong key then doesn't know when to come in!!
    Q. What does a bass player use for contraception?
    A. His personality!!!!!




    Q. How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
    A. 12, one to change it and 11 to say they could do it better.

    We detuned one of the bass players strings, but didn't tell him which one!!!!!!

    Q. How do you make a singer cross??
    A. Nail two singers together!!!!




    Q. What's the difference between a bass and a coffin?
    A. The coffin has the stiff on the inside!!



    Q. What did the guitarist get on his IQ test paper.
    A. Saliva!!




    Q. What do you call a bass player with friends?
    A. A liar!!

    Q. What is the difference between a bass player and a large Pizza.
    A. A Pizza can feed a family of four!!



    Q. What do you call an idiot that hangs around and annoys drummers?
    A. A bass player!!

    Q. Why is it bad when the drum solo stops?
    A. Bass solo begins!!


    Q. What do you call a guitarist in a 3 piece suit?
    A. The defendent!



    Q. Why do people instantly hate singers?
    A. It saves time in the long run!


    Q. How do you get a guitarist to stop playing ?
    A. Put the music in front of him!!!!!!



    Q. What do you call a bassist without a girlfriend ?
    A. Homeless!!!!!

  4. #19

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    damnit
    who let u back on
    I broke my bass playing rockstar in the living room again.

  5. #20

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    only like 2 jokes here were ok
    c'mon post something funny
    Uberscenester power up!!

  6. #21

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    Pretty funny! My favorite British joke of all time:

    A man walks into a bar........





    ouch.



    Lync

  7. #22

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    Originally posted by jubjub721
    damnit
    who let u back on
    The question is who DIIIIIDN'T let me back on.

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