O/T I hired a French Maid!!!

[fsmith]

The vision that comes to mind (a dirty mind of course) is a young beautiful blond in a maid outfit with fishnet stockings. I’ll find out Friday.





But it’ll probably be some fat, smelly ogre that will bitch at me… still should be good for some laughs though,

I'm picturing Berta from "Two and a Half Men"... She'll whip your ass into shape Chuck!



fred

 

[BigBallz]

I'm not allowed to get the house dirty.....

 

[kbaim]

Don't you just hate it when women do that!

Our maid comes every two weeks. My wife and I spend the evening before she gets there straigtening everything up...

i.e.
Stashing the needles and spoons, putting away the porn, picking up larry's underwear from the last 2 weeks.

Things of this nature.

 

[Mobay45]

i.e.
...picking up larry's underwear from the last 2 weeks.

Things of this nature.

That's only 2 pair!!! It's not that big a deal!

 

[francric]

Just so everyone understands, hiring a maid is a big slap in my face, an admission of defeat and failure! When I came off the road 10 years ago my mission was to take care of my own kids (fire the nanny) and take care of the house. My wife makes all the money and my job was to fill the other positions. I apparently have failed in one of those jobs or the maid thing wouldn’t be needed.

I’m trying to have fun with this, but it ain’t really funny to me. Plus I also know that no maid will meet the expectations of said wife and I’ll be doing all the cleaning that gets done anyway, it’s an up hill battle. I have two teenagers, three cats and I’m a natural born slob…. This will never work!

WOW, a kept man, your my hero psycho!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Mobay45]

WOW, a kept man, your my hero psycho!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm a kept man too!

My wife is probably going to keep me working until I die.

 

[Dees]

My mother often drops me off at my student home (so I don't need to get their by public transportation, which is expensive), and she always wants to clean my room than quite convenient actually!

 

[tadawson]

I'm a kept man too!

My wife is probably going to keep me working until I die.

Hey! You had last friday evening off! And all night . . . . and probably a good part of the morning! So qwitcherbitchin!

- Tim

 

[Colin]

If we had a maid, my wife would clean the house before she arrived and then she'd clean it after she's left. I've even caught her watching cable shows about cleaning! Looks like an intervention is on the cards.

Colin

 

[Mobay45]

Hey! You had last friday evening off! And all night . . . . and probably a good part of the morning! So qwitcherbitchin!

- Tim

I don't think I shook that off until sometimes Sunday!

 

[adouglas]

That's only 2 pair!!! It's not that big a deal!

More than one pair of underwear?

What a concept! I had no idea....

 

[tadawson]

I don't think I shook that off until sometimes Sunday!

Oy! My condolences! One minute we were talking away, and then . . . . gone!

- Tim

 

[francric]

Hey, tomorrow is the big day right????? Keep us posted on how it goes and don't forget the pics if you can......

 

[mike not fat]

Psycho, if you need some nasty things to tell her in french (so your wife can't understand what you say), ask me.

MNF

 

[Psycho Ward]

Psycho, if you need some nasty things to tell her in french (so your wife can't understand what you say), ask me.

MNF

I would probably need to know how to say things like…

“Its ok, that’s legal in this country”.

“No, that’s not a fancy pattern, its mold.”

“Those are educational videos.”

“Yes, that is a picture of me naked holding a bass guitar, and no they never caught the person who made me do it…”

“I don’t know the phone number for the Health Department.”

“Yes I know Jack Williams… but not in that way!”

“Sorry but rules and rules, no clothes allowed in the house!”

 

[strummer]

Nawww .. the women are the ones with the hairy armpits.

Sooo true.

 

[strummer]

Get a Swedish maid, and say:

Det är ok, det är lagligt i det här landet.

Nej, det är inget mönster, det är mögel.

Det där är utbildningsvideos.

Ja, det där är den bild på mig naken hållandes en bas, och nej dom fick inte tag på killen som tvingade mig att göra det...

Jag kan inte telefonnumret till hälsodepartementet.

Ja, jag känner Jack Williams, fast inte på DET sättet.

Tyvärr, regler är regler, kläder är förbjudna i det här huset.

 

[Psycho Ward]

Well she is here and must be pretty successful too she drives one of the biggest SUV’s I’ve ever seen! I think it’s one of those Chevy Subdivision’s!

OK. She is a nice lady and got right to work, no need to get excited. All of our imaginations got away from us; I’ll have a clean house that’s about it…

 

[mike not fat]

I would probably need to know how to say things like…

“Its ok, that’s legal in this country” = "c'est ok, c'est légal dans ce pays"

“No, that’s not a fancy pattern, its mold" (soory I don't understand this one)

“Those are educational videos" = "ce sont des video d'apprentissage"

“Yes, that is a picture of me naked holding a bass guitar, and no they never caught the person who made me do it…” = "oui, ce sont des photos de moi, nu avec une basse ; malheureusement ils n'ont jamais attrapé la personne qui m'a forcé à faire cela".

“I don’t know the phone number for the Health Department.” = "je ne connais pas le numéro de téléphone du département de santé"

“Yes I know Jack Williams… but not in that way!” = "oui, je connais Jack Williams...mais pas de cette manière !"

“Sorry but rules and rules, no clothes allowed in the house!”= désolais, mais les règles sont les règles : le port des vêtements est interdit dans la maison"

And be carefull, everyone knows what "voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir ?" means !

MNF

 

[BigBallz]

And be carefull, everyone knows what "voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir ?" means !

MNF

You want pickles on that burger?