Dr Stankface
Well-known member
Do you guys have anything that we should know? This will be my first experience on a plane so i'm kind of clueless. 
- Thread starter Dr Stankface
- Start date
Psycho Ward
Well-known member
Don't drink the water in the restroom and flying is dangerous, pack a gun!
martin shane
Well-known member
+1 haha ...
mynan
Well-known member
Chew gum...
phatduckk
Well-known member
dont worry about it. its easier than being in a bus. might be a bit crapped but its honestly not even worth thinking about.
main problem is you might get bored since flying across the country takes a few hours. getting bored is my main problem. take an iPod, magazine & a book. also, most important, I HIGHLY recommend you bring along a laptop with a handful of DVDs (2 for the trip over and 2 for teh trip back). flights may have movies but they usually suck and you'll end up watching some Drew Berrymore crap for a couple hours
Flying bored the living crap out of me till i started bringing movies along.
main problem is you might get bored since flying across the country takes a few hours. getting bored is my main problem. take an iPod, magazine & a book. also, most important, I HIGHLY recommend you bring along a laptop with a handful of DVDs (2 for the trip over and 2 for teh trip back). flights may have movies but they usually suck and you'll end up watching some Drew Berrymore crap for a couple hours
Flying bored the living crap out of me till i started bringing movies along.
Dr Stankface
Well-known member
Oh i'll bring along a nice collection of movies. I also have every season of Family Guy (yes, even the new one ) so I should be able to occupy my flight time with hilarity.
) so I should be able to occupy my flight time with hilarity. 
Freddels
Well-known member
Try not to put all of your weight in the seat. You just don't know if it can hold you and you might fall through the bottom of the plane.
tiffles
Well-known member
a few hours... TRY 12!!... sorry, ill stop whinging.... seriously though first plane trip is SO much fun. take off is the best... so much power, and then seeing that the world from up high really DOES look like those topographical maps makes me giggle.
youll love it!
ill be dosing up on the sleeping pills n ill have to borrow some dvds...
youll love it!
ill be dosing up on the sleeping pills
n ill have to borrow some dvds...
Big Poppa
Well-known member
Oh my god what a setup
first wear boots that have really secure laces.....also wear alot of chains and metal for the detector....they like it whe guys back the line up to take off their boots and jewlrey.
Make joke about your uncle from Iran...it breaks the ice with the security...When they cavity search you after they didnt get your joke then they usually like it when you say "usually this costs me a steak dinner"
Hit on the stewardesses. That is why they are there. They like it when you stare at their behinds and whistle and wink. Be sure to ask them about the miule high club, They never get asked about that either.
Please ignore that size thing regarding carryons...if you wink just right they will let you block boarding isles while you try to fit your square bag unto the round hole storage.
Eat a lot of garlic and raw onions for the flight and be sure to start talking to the person next to you......
If you get gas that is ok. Let it fly and then pull your t shirt over your nose and look at the guy next to you with a look of disdain.
Excercise is very important at altitude. make sure you get up and down only if you are in the middle seat and make bad jokes about peeing like a race horse. When getting up be sure to jerk yourself up by the seat back in front of you...its ok the guy in fromt doesnt need the sleep.
ALways take both armrests.......It is first come first served.
and finally dont forget to ask for those plastic captians wings!
first wear boots that have really secure laces.....also wear alot of chains and metal for the detector....they like it whe guys back the line up to take off their boots and jewlrey.
Make joke about your uncle from Iran...it breaks the ice with the security...When they cavity search you after they didnt get your joke then they usually like it when you say "usually this costs me a steak dinner"
Hit on the stewardesses. That is why they are there. They like it when you stare at their behinds and whistle and wink. Be sure to ask them about the miule high club, They never get asked about that either.
Please ignore that size thing regarding carryons...if you wink just right they will let you block boarding isles while you try to fit your square bag unto the round hole storage.
Eat a lot of garlic and raw onions for the flight and be sure to start talking to the person next to you......
If you get gas that is ok. Let it fly and then pull your t shirt over your nose and look at the guy next to you with a look of disdain.
Excercise is very important at altitude. make sure you get up and down only if you are in the middle seat and make bad jokes about peeing like a race horse. When getting up be sure to jerk yourself up by the seat back in front of you...its ok the guy in fromt doesnt need the sleep.
ALways take both armrests.......It is first come first served.
and finally dont forget to ask for those plastic captians wings!
jaylegroove
Well-known member
Do you guys have anything that we should know? This will be my first experience on a plane so i'm kind of clueless.
If you ever feel the need to vomit during the flight, NEVER try to open a door or a window.
Chewie
Well-known member
In this post 9/11 day in age it can be annoying getting on the plane. Personally I don't like to check items, I like to carry on. For long trips this probably isn't possible. If you have luggage you're going to check, I'd put all you're deodorant, cologne, toothpaste, mouthwash, etc in that luggage. If you carry it on it all has to fit in a plastic bag. I think they're freezer size ziplock bag size if I remember correctly. Haven't flown since X-mas. I'd almost suggest getting the travel size items and then just leaving them behind when you head home. Liquids sketch out the TSA. Don't buy a bottle of water before going through security cause they'll probably make you throw it away. TSA is gonna make you take of your shoes. belt, and anything metal.
if you get motion sick, bring dramine or something. if you get sick try look looking towards the horizon. That only really helps me when sailing though. I typically don't get motion sick unless I'm reading something for extended periods of time. Chewing gum will help with pressure/altitude changes.
If you're tall like me (6'6") and flying coach, try to get either the first row in coach or the emergency exit rows. I also prefer the aisle so I can stick my legs out. Though be careful falling asleep cause the stewardess will ram the beverage and meal cart into your legs instead of waking you and politely asking you to move your legs.
if you get motion sick, bring dramine or something. if you get sick try look looking towards the horizon. That only really helps me when sailing though. I typically don't get motion sick unless I'm reading something for extended periods of time. Chewing gum will help with pressure/altitude changes.
If you're tall like me (6'6") and flying coach, try to get either the first row in coach or the emergency exit rows. I also prefer the aisle so I can stick my legs out. Though be careful falling asleep cause the stewardess will ram the beverage and meal cart into your legs instead of waking you and politely asking you to move your legs.
adouglas
Well-known member
Every time you hear a noise (like the gear retracting, say, or the little "dong" sound that the PA makes) give a start, sit straight up in your seat, look around wildly and shout
OH MY GOD, WHAT WAS THAT??!!?? ARE WE GOING TO DIE? WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE, I KNOW IT!
Seriously....
- Pack all your metal and electronic widgets in such a way that you can easily dump them out of your bag for the security check, and then dump them all back in the bag. You DON'T want to have to go digging for your digital camera or whatever.
- Current TSA rules are that all of your toiletries have to be put in a clear, quart-sized ziploc bag. Too much of a PITA for me...I just hit the local pharmacy or Wally-World when I land, buy what I'll need while I'm there and leave it behind.
- Drink plenty of water on the plane (you won't be allowed to bring any with you, BTW). The air in planes is very, very dry and you can get dehydrated. You'll really feel this since you're from the ever-lovin' steamy Southeast.
- You're going to be cramped up in a very tight seat for several hours. Do some stretches from time to time.
- Planes aren't super-loud, but the noise is constant and wearying. Get some earplugs, the kind that vent (I use the Bose headphones, which work GREAT on planes).
- +1 on the gum chewing, and/or learn how to clear your ears (hold your nose, close your mouth and blow hard to pop your eardrums).
OH MY GOD, WHAT WAS THAT??!!?? ARE WE GOING TO DIE? WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE, I KNOW IT!
Seriously....
- Pack all your metal and electronic widgets in such a way that you can easily dump them out of your bag for the security check, and then dump them all back in the bag. You DON'T want to have to go digging for your digital camera or whatever.
- Current TSA rules are that all of your toiletries have to be put in a clear, quart-sized ziploc bag. Too much of a PITA for me...I just hit the local pharmacy or Wally-World when I land, buy what I'll need while I'm there and leave it behind.
- Drink plenty of water on the plane (you won't be allowed to bring any with you, BTW). The air in planes is very, very dry and you can get dehydrated. You'll really feel this since you're from the ever-lovin' steamy Southeast.
- You're going to be cramped up in a very tight seat for several hours. Do some stretches from time to time.
- Planes aren't super-loud, but the noise is constant and wearying. Get some earplugs, the kind that vent (I use the Bose headphones, which work GREAT on planes).
- +1 on the gum chewing, and/or learn how to clear your ears (hold your nose, close your mouth and blow hard to pop your eardrums).
Dr Stankface
Well-known member
Hey BP, if I hit on the stewartess Rebecca might...
Oh wait. It doesn't matter. I'm doing what I want.
Oh wait. It doesn't matter. I'm doing what I want.
Last edited:
spencer
Well-known member
- Joined
- May 4, 2006
- Messages
- 591
I haven't flown since before 9/11, it was so cool because me and my dad had knifes in our pockets and they allowed us to bring them on in our pockets..
The plane will hit pockets of air and it will feel like your falling out of the sky for a second or two, but thoes seconds feel longer than that..
Umm don't be alarmed if you start farting more than you ever have in your life, this is normal when they pressureize the cabin, I thought they were supposed to pressureize it to ground pressure, I guess they do, not sure but I know this happens...
The plane will hit pockets of air and it will feel like your falling out of the sky for a second or two, but thoes seconds feel longer than that..
Umm don't be alarmed if you start farting more than you ever have in your life, this is normal when they pressureize the cabin, I thought they were supposed to pressureize it to ground pressure, I guess they do, not sure but I know this happens...
bovinehost
Administrator
Best. Advice. Ever.
OK, I have never flown either but am trying to conjure up an image here.
You guys are sayin' a plane gets way up high in the sky and everybody sitting in rather close proximity to one another starts farting the place up. Yum, makes me think oh boy what's on the menu today
Dr Stankface
Well-known member
I'm going to assume I should stay away from sitting around large people.
