- Thread starter Dr Stankface
- Start date
Sky Mall has a wide range of attractive Christmas present options. If you're shopping for me, please buy the Remote Spider Smasher + Vaccuum device. I need me one of those things...
My favorite is sedative-induced Duty Free shopping sprees on international flights.
OK, back off of this purchase, Stanky. I mean, I know you're not going to be able to resist, there not being a woman around for a while, but it just doesn't get any better than the Mademoiselle Haute Couture lamp:
"Mademoiselle Haute Couture" Floor Lamp Sculpture
Our life-sized work of decorative art--glamorously six-feet tall with her black fabric shade--has the chic knee-high boots, trendy cocktail dress and accentuated curves that make her a timeless, always-in-style, fashion statement.
Cast in quality designer resin with a sumptuous black faux-leather finish, her provocative presence demands attention anywhere she strikes a pose!
Accepts your 60-watt bulb; switch-on cord."
Only $750! What a steal!
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bovinehost
Administrator
"quality designer resin"
You don't see those three words together very often.
You don't see those three words together very often.
bovinehost
Administrator
Thy will be done.
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sloshep
Well-known member
Great advice in here - I'll try to add to or reinforce what's already been posted:
Water - drink it before and during the flight and stay hydrated. Now this may conflict with the window seat advice if you're back and forth to the restroom multiple times during the flight.
Seat - Exit row is the prime Coach seat for a bit more leg room. Window seats are great for snoozing and gazing. Given this is your first flight, I suspect you'll appreciate the view. Aisle seats afford a bit more elbow room (on one side), but that same elbow room comes with the constant fear of losing your elbow (or knee, or foot) to an aisle cart that always seems to rumble by with little disregard for any impediments to it's forward motion. Avoid the middle seat, unless you want to make friends.
Gum - or sucking candies - have lots and keep it going, especially on take-off and landing. The changes in pressure can be very uncomfortable in the ears and the chewing and swallowing will help.
Hands - wash them as soon as you deplane. Lord knows what you might have picked-up being confined in a closed space with so many folks breathing each others recirculated air for hours.
Turbulence - ignore it. keep your seat belt fastened while seated (however loosely you'd like) and just relax. Plane may bump and bounce at times - doesn't mean it'll lose a wing.
Most importantly, enjoy the experience and have a safe trip!
Stanky, this REAL ADVICE above is good for the first time traveler. Also stay calm, be polite when interacting with TSA and airline employees. If you are unsure what to do ask someone. If you explain you are new at this people will tend to help you and cut some slack.
It took me almost 5 minutes to stop laughing from these other posts to type something helpful.
you guys crack me up.
Aussie Mark
Well-known member
Another thing Andrew, if you're travelling alone, tell the stewardess, and after takeoff she will bring you a gift bag containing a coloring book and a soft toy.
Colin
Well-known member
If an announcement comes over asking "is there a doctor on board"? Say yes it's the best way to get moved into business class. Otherwise just ask for the location of the black box, that has to be the safest spot to sit...
Aussie Mark
Well-known member
Fiji?
Colin
Well-known member
No, back up singers from Earth Wind and Fire
Aussie Mark
Well-known member
And, if you see Jack on the plane, don't shout out "Hi, Jack!"
Aussie Mark
Well-known member
Thank you very much. We're playing this venue all week.
AnthonyD
Well-known member
Freddels
Well-known member
Stanky, this REAL ADVICE above is good for the first time traveler. Also stay calm, be polite when interacting with TSA and airline employees. If you are unsure what to do ask someone. If you explain you are new at this people will tend to help you and cut some slack.
It took me almost 5 minutes to stop laughing from these other posts to type something helpful.
Don't take your shoes off is also real advice. Your feet will swell and you won't be able to get your shoes back on when it's time to get off the plane.
AnthonyD
Well-known member
...and the guy or gal sitting beside you won't appreciate it one bit either!
Should I ask
Farther up in the thread. One of the most impressive uses of metaphor I've ever read on the internet.
Dr Stankface
Well-known member
Would singing "That's The Way (I Like It)" to the stewardess every time she brings me something earn me some points?
