Off Topic I have a choice to make

[DTG]

As most of you know I play in a very busy wedding/Corp band and love it. But I also do some dep work and play with an original artist.
The original band is starting to make some waves and have been offered some gigs in Europe. We are getting allot of AirPlay locally and some national stuff too. It's getting to the stage of picking one over the other

I set up and run the wedding gig and make a very good living from it and get to come home to the wife and kids everynight,but the lure of playing big stages and festivals again is still there.

At 38 my head is saying stay with the wedding gig, many a bass player would love that gig and I have played all the festivals in Ireland and came out broke from most of them.

But ... In a dream land we could release and hit the charts running or spend the next 10 years trying. However there is some history with the original act and it's getting interest from all the right people.

Sorry it's so of topic but I could just do with a sounding board !
Either way it will always be my ebmm's that get played no matter which gig it is

Dave.

 

[Freddels]

Find a competent sub for the wedding/corp band.

 

[JayDawg]

Dave, I have been in a similar predicament in the Christian music industry. Not anything where I would be making millions or be famous but the possibility to tour constantly and do that full time was there. If I was single, I would do it but I am 37, I have kids and a wife and as much as I love playing music, doing something like that would take away too much of their time unless they were with me and that time with them in priceless and something you can never get back. I am content with just playing worship music now and jamming with friends and doing an occasional show. I am not as familiar with the music scene in Europe as I am in the States so I don't know how much money could be made but if that is the choice you choose, there will be a lot of Daddy time from your kids that you can never get back. I'm not judging you with whatever decision you make but just at least take that into consideration.

 

[Eilif]

You have a responsibility as a husband and father. That has to come before anything else. If the big dream is compatible with this, then go for it.

 

[Aussie Mark]

Find a competent sub for the wedding/corp band.

+1

 

[MSilvers]

If there is anyway you could come back to the wedding band and gig if the thing with the original artist doesn't work out that would be cool. Otherwise that's a very hard decision. It's almost like one of those game shows where you've won a cool prize, but you can give it up for what's behind the curtain, you don't know if it will be a new sports car or a jar of pickles.

 

[OldManMusic]

Life is too short for regrets. If you think you'd be happier on the big stage, you'll never forgive yourself for not trying. But remember that the grass always looks greener on the other side. You might be on the greener side right now with a steady paying gig and a family to come home to at night. Touring guys might start out thinking they have it made, but the reality of life in a different hotel room everynight, with the added bump extreme boredom between performances and feeling like your in the movie Groundhog Day drives lots of good players into bad habits. Its a hard choice, Dave. Go with your gut.

 

[mmbassplayer]

Dave... we have all had dreams of being a rockstar. Most never made it quite as close as you are right now. Do you really want to kick yourself the rest of your days for not trying it? I am sure you can work something out with your "day-job" so you are in a position to return if you need to. Talk to your family and let them know you really need to give this a shot. They will understand. Best of luck either way. JOSH

Edit... If you sell a million album BP will build you a custom bass (i think that is what he said). So you have a secondary motivation.

 

[J Romano]

Family first, as mmbassplayer said, talk with them. A family discussion is in order! And be sure you won't loose the paying gig upon return......

 

[DTG]

I could get a dep, however I would prob still have to run the show and I could come back to it in6 months or a year.

It's the time away from my family that is the biggest thing for me. It took me 8 years to become a dad and as I sit here typing this me and my boy are sharing breakfast.
To them I am a rockstar.

When I met my wife I was touring with a band and I remember the days of sitting in hotels waiting on the next gig.
She is very much behind me which ever way it goes.

It's a gamble I could give it a year and play the best gigs but have very little money to show for it however I can still earn a wage running the wedding band.
Or i keep on where I am, I have built this band from the ground up and we are one of the busiest bands in ireland and I do love it.

But ...... The last big gig I did was with a gospel group to around 11,000 people and man that such a kick.


I think the gameshow remark is the best, if your happy with what you have it does not matter whats behind the curtain.

Thanks for your replies guys and thanks again to BP for allowing this as it is so far off topic. But my kids mean more to me than a Davey sig Sr5 ( no matter what size neck )
Plus really if Craig hasn't got one yet what hope is there for the rest of us !!

 

[cellkirk74]

Find a competent sub for the wedding/corp band.

That.

As nice as the wedding gig may be, making music is about creating something on your own. Go where your heart is.

 

[keko]

I'm, today exactly 6 years older than You dude and we're in the same business (wedding, party..etc., ...wife and kids too), ...so I just wanna say ...I'd stick with weddings, ...but that's me!

Only huge salary could convince me to change the band, or the way to play bass and earn some money!

 

[MadMatt]

I could get a dep, however I would prob still have to run the show and I could come back to it in6 months or a year.

Sounds like you have a fall back plan in place and your family is behind you. Go for it!!!

If there is a little voice in side your head that is saying you will regret not going with the gigs then you need to take the risk. Otherwise it may nag you the rest of your life. (Especially if they hit it big )

If the relationship with your wife and son are solid then the time away will only make you grow closer. I spent a year working in a distant city and only seeing my then 3 year old daughter and wife on the weekends. We are still a happy family today and although that phase was sometimes rough, we would not be where we are as a family today if I would not have done that.

Go for it mate!

-M@

 

[Movielife]

Go for it if it's possible!

 

[Lynottfan]

I l know what you mean about a big gig, when I did a stadium gig to 16,000 people and heard the applause as we walked off at the end, there is as, the blues brothers say no chemical that can compete! To have the chance of that again is a mighty tempter, you however have a family and a great gig already, making money to, now that is a rarity today So much respect to you, a tricky choice, but it comes really comes down to Which one, honestly, do you enjoy and want the most mate?

Best regards,

Andrew.

 

[Freddels]

You might kick yourself if they make it big but you might kick yourself for missing family time too.

If you go out for a year and they don't make it, you might decide to leave and then a few months later, they make it. You did all the dirty work and don't get the rewards. It's sort of like dropping coins in a slot machine . . . when you do stop? Because the next guy comes along and drops in one coin and wins the jackpot.

 

[DTG]

Met up with the original act today to touch base and see what we were all thinking.
She is a singer song writer, who has done some pretty big tv work in the uk and ireland.

We pushed her a bit as to where she saw things going with the band and she told us that she couldn't give her loyalty to any Musican she works with.

I don't know why I get surprised by the music buss or the people in it but after working with this girl on and off for the last 3 years I told her I couldn't go on as I was just too busy with my wedding gig.

There really allot to be said for a diary filled with weddings ! 3 weddings this week A Corp dinner dance and a quiet pub gig o n Sunday and as I said I get to come home to my beautiful wife and kids every night.

 

[five7]

At least she was honest.

 

[DTG]

Lol there is that !!

 

[DTG]

Don't get me wrong it all ended good I just won't be taking the tour, but I will still help out where I can.
Plus I have always thought she has a great talent as a song writer and she will make a career from that.