zombi
Well-known member
I think ebmm should come out with a guitar with a breathalizer built in. If you're to drunk, you don't play...
Off Topic The self ownage thread
- Thread starter edrod
- Start date
Butch Snyder
Well-known member
Y'all young guys and new players are lucky we have this wonderful Internet. I remember having an Ibanez AM-50 (3/4-size ES-335 copy). I loved that guitar until I got the Strat bug. This was in 1984 and I was 19. Everyone was playing Strats - but I digress....
I was in my local music store - you know the ones, where they have all these vintage guitars hanging on the walls that no one can touch or buy. They were the owner's private collection that he loved to show off - again, I digress...
I saw they had some Gibson pickups for sale. This was before Gibson branded the 57 Classics and such. They came in a light blue box and were nickel-covered with a cream mounting ring (nice touch). I installed the pickup and couldn't wait to test it. By itself, it sounded very nice. I used the neck+bridge pickups quite a lot back then. When I started playing in that position, I got this thinner, honky tone. You know exactly what I'm talking about and the cause. I didn't...
I had no idea about these pickup being out-of-phase with each other. I looked at my wiring - yep, everything looked fine. I thought the pickup was broken or something. I took it back. The store didn't want to accept it. I told them my issue and that I just wanted a good one. I took it home and rewired it; same dang thang.... After trying 6 new Gibson pickups, I reinstalled the original Super 58. Ahhh - back to where we need to be....
Had I had this place or even known of some decent techs, I would have learned that my pickups were fine; just out of phase with each other.
Well, I have to say that was the absolute stoooooopidest and nooooobiest guitar thing I have ever done.
I was in my local music store - you know the ones, where they have all these vintage guitars hanging on the walls that no one can touch or buy. They were the owner's private collection that he loved to show off - again, I digress...
I saw they had some Gibson pickups for sale. This was before Gibson branded the 57 Classics and such. They came in a light blue box and were nickel-covered with a cream mounting ring (nice touch). I installed the pickup and couldn't wait to test it. By itself, it sounded very nice. I used the neck+bridge pickups quite a lot back then. When I started playing in that position, I got this thinner, honky tone. You know exactly what I'm talking about and the cause. I didn't...
I had no idea about these pickup being out-of-phase with each other. I looked at my wiring - yep, everything looked fine. I thought the pickup was broken or something. I took it back. The store didn't want to accept it. I told them my issue and that I just wanted a good one. I took it home and rewired it; same dang thang.... After trying 6 new Gibson pickups, I reinstalled the original Super 58. Ahhh - back to where we need to be....
Had I had this place or even known of some decent techs, I would have learned that my pickups were fine; just out of phase with each other.
Well, I have to say that was the absolute stoooooopidest and nooooobiest guitar thing I have ever done.
Last edited:
lenny
Well-known member
I don't think our old mate "The Stoner" posts here any more.
I know this is the "Self Ownage" thread, but this link truly belongs here.
Footage courtesy of Tim O'Sullivan's YouTube channel !
YouTube - The Stoner Plays 'All Right Now'
Oh my oh my Dizzy ........hehehehehe ....i wonder if Tim can tell us the reason why they call him the Stoner......or maybe we already know hahahahaha
guertzi
Well-known member
D.K.
Well-known member
I so far didn't have any bigger mishaps when playing live, rehearsing, or at home - nowhere near the stories some of You guys have experienced, BUT (and for fear of totally embarassing myself):
When I was a child of 3-5 years old living in the USSR, my parents, who knew very well their boy loves music, took me to a lot of rock and pop concerts. However, every time we went, they took my child-sized ice-hockey stick with us. The reason was, for the whole duration of the concert I went out into the next gangway near our sits in the hall, and, paying absolutely no attention to the awed people around me, played my "guitar" - the ice hockey stick - and headbanged to the tunes.
Now, the funny part for me - I don't have any recollection of that whatsoever, but the pictures my parents took during those nights make me laugh every time I see them.
When I was a child of 3-5 years old living in the USSR, my parents, who knew very well their boy loves music, took me to a lot of rock and pop concerts. However, every time we went, they took my child-sized ice-hockey stick with us. The reason was, for the whole duration of the concert I went out into the next gangway near our sits in the hall, and, paying absolutely no attention to the awed people around me, played my "guitar" - the ice hockey stick - and headbanged to the tunes.
Now, the funny part for me - I don't have any recollection of that whatsoever, but the pictures my parents took during those nights make me laugh every time I see them.
Butch Snyder
Well-known member
Awesome! That's pretty cool...
Astrofreq
Well-known member
The dumbest thing I ever did was purchase George L's do-it-yourself cables. Those have caused me more aggravation than any concert follies just trying to find which one wasn't working.
Spudmurphy
Well-known member
Dumbest thing - played a residency in Munich in the 70's. PN Club Schwabing.
Band on the week before was AC DC the band on the week after us was Japan - but I digress.
1) Bass player spoke fluent German, but I wanted to impress our entourage and go down and buy some meat for the stew we were cooking. We had taken bags of potatoes, carrots onions to save on money.
I buy the "meat" come back upstairs to the apartment (the ones they built for the Munich Olympics games)and place the "Meat" in the pot.
We are rehearsing and someone says "8loody 'ell - look at the friggin pot - I had bought a polonyand it was like a friggin baloon waiting to explode! Someone dived over and "stabbed it" with a fork and it was like a mini meat explosion.
2)same appartment - night time I'm on the top bunk - drummer sleeping on the floor - I fall out of bed , my head hits the drummers hip bone and I'm concussed for several days.
3)Same tour - Spud is playing guitar and backing vocals. I'd been wary about the house electrics what with the clicks and pops whenever i touched a (metal) pillar. Anyway concussed Spud steps up to the microphone to add a backing vocal - ZAPPPPP! Spud is now lying on his back propelled backwards lying up against the Marshall 4 x12 with his Les Paul howling away.
Man that tour was so funny and I could tell so many stories about it I would have you crying with laughter - good times and that's why I will never sell my Les Paul cos it holds too many memories.
Band on the week before was AC DC the band on the week after us was Japan - but I digress.
1) Bass player spoke fluent German, but I wanted to impress our entourage and go down and buy some meat for the stew we were cooking. We had taken bags of potatoes, carrots onions to save on money.
I buy the "meat" come back upstairs to the apartment (the ones they built for the Munich Olympics games)and place the "Meat" in the pot.
We are rehearsing and someone says "8loody 'ell - look at the friggin pot - I had bought a polonyand it was like a friggin baloon waiting to explode! Someone dived over and "stabbed it" with a fork and it was like a mini meat explosion.
2)same appartment - night time I'm on the top bunk - drummer sleeping on the floor - I fall out of bed , my head hits the drummers hip bone and I'm concussed for several days.
3)Same tour - Spud is playing guitar and backing vocals. I'd been wary about the house electrics what with the clicks and pops whenever i touched a (metal) pillar. Anyway concussed Spud steps up to the microphone to add a backing vocal - ZAPPPPP! Spud is now lying on his back propelled backwards lying up against the Marshall 4 x12 with his Les Paul howling away.
Man that tour was so funny and I could tell so many stories about it I would have you crying with laughter - good times and that's why I will never sell my Les Paul cos it holds too many memories.
spychocyco
Well-known member
- Joined
- Feb 16, 2008
- Messages
- 800
Um... I put my pick in my mouth all the time when I'm fingerpicking. I think I'll stop now.
marduke
Well-known member
haha yeah i put my pick in my mouth too... and i use jazzIII's... probably wont stop though.. lol
PugNinjas
Well-known member
First attempt at playing live ever
These two brothers did this weekly gig a a local joint that had no problems letting some underage people into the bar. The place was always packed with my friends which included these two brothers. One played piano/keyboards, the other guitar. Both were excellent signers and pros in every sense of the word. They invite me to bring my guitar and amp to play Johnny B Goode with them. I get totally psyched, practice my butt off and am all ready to jam the song. It must be noted that, at the time, I had the cheesiest of cheesy Peavey amps (about the size of those tiny Gorilla amps from awhile back) and for some reason, I thought this amp was fine for the occasion.
Low and behold, this amp sizzles into an empty silence immediately after I played barely a millisecond of the first note. Dejected, sad and embarrassed, I stood there for the entire song before I trudged my stuff away from the 'real' musicians.
As much as I felt like a dillhole, I learned an important lesson that day about having legitimate functioning equipment that can handle the situation/gig.
These two brothers did this weekly gig a a local joint that had no problems letting some underage people into the bar. The place was always packed with my friends which included these two brothers. One played piano/keyboards, the other guitar. Both were excellent signers and pros in every sense of the word. They invite me to bring my guitar and amp to play Johnny B Goode with them. I get totally psyched, practice my butt off and am all ready to jam the song. It must be noted that, at the time, I had the cheesiest of cheesy Peavey amps (about the size of those tiny Gorilla amps from awhile back) and for some reason, I thought this amp was fine for the occasion.
Low and behold, this amp sizzles into an empty silence immediately after I played barely a millisecond of the first note. Dejected, sad and embarrassed, I stood there for the entire song before I trudged my stuff away from the 'real' musicians.
As much as I felt like a dillhole, I learned an important lesson that day about having legitimate functioning equipment that can handle the situation/gig.
Dizzy
Well-known member
Um... I put my pick in my mouth all the time .............
^^^^
Luckily you guys aren't making any typo's !
Would be SERIOUS Self "Ownage".
leftyguitarblue
Well-known member
^^^^ nice Dizzy, good call.
^^^^
Luckily you guys aren't making any typo's !
Would be SERIOUS Self "Ownage".
Isn't today Pi = Di day?
Slingy
Well-known member
Having a little fun at my expense huh. Alright game on.
(Purple tortex just don't go down well, it would have been a better story if I had actually vomitted)
(Purple tortex just don't go down well, it would have been a better story if I had actually vomitted)
marduke
Well-known member
^^^^
Luckily you guys aren't making any typo's !
Would be SERIOUS Self "Ownage".
HAHA oh gosh.... i had to re-read what you were getting at....
your a riot Diz! 
GuitarHack
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jun 22, 2006
- Messages
- 981
Once I was playing live, we finished playing "Unchained" in dropped-D. Crowd was fired up, band was fired up, and we launched into "Sweet Home Alabama". I forgot to pop the little D-tuner back in, so I pretty much modded the intro on the fly to a somewhat dissonant D-C-F progression. It sounded so bad, and of course the guitar was all by itself, I had to just stop, mumble something dumb, pop the D-tuner back in and start over. It really took the wind out of everyone's sails.
I was jumping around like a goof once onstage in high school talent show. I was playing a Strat with a trem, and using a coiled amp cord, running straight out of the guitar into my amp. Jumping around, I somehow got the coiled cord wound around the whammy bar, and only noticed when the whole guitar starting going up and down and in and out of tune. I had to stop to get the cord off the whammy bar. I looked like an idiot. Not like that Strat was ever really in tune anyway...
I was jumping around like a goof once onstage in high school talent show. I was playing a Strat with a trem, and using a coiled amp cord, running straight out of the guitar into my amp. Jumping around, I somehow got the coiled cord wound around the whammy bar, and only noticed when the whole guitar starting going up and down and in and out of tune. I had to stop to get the cord off the whammy bar. I looked like an idiot. Not like that Strat was ever really in tune anyway...
Last edited:
GuitarHack
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jun 22, 2006
- Messages
- 981
Oh yeah, on that same Strat, I broke a whammy bar on stage. It broke right at the bridge, I had to drill the broken piece out. That wasn't so embarrassing as the others, but I just remembered it. That Strat was a '79 I believe, a real POS.
pjc812
Well-known member
I did a brief stint at a local church for their youth outreach program. Pretty big church, a lot of players so we always had a full band.
I usually have multiple guitars for standard tuning and D standard. I run them through an old Vestax effects loop thing so I can use one amp. It works. The Vestax is programmable and I *thought* I had it programmed idiot proof. Some kid stepped on the pedals and changed the programming, unbeknownst to me.
We did Cradle of Filth's version of Temptation (it worked somehow.) Well, when we went to hit the "big chord", no guitar signal. It fell flat on its face. I finally got the thing figured out and we started over but it pretty well sucked.
Another night (the last performance actually), we went up on stage to play the final song for the evening. The stage lights had not come up yet. I went to strap my JP7 on and the strap came off. The JP7 fell on my foot breaking my toe. The drummer kept asking me "do I start yet?" No dude, give me a minute. The guitar was fine. I ended up having to get X rays and the whole bit. I couldn't walk the next day. The other beautiful thing is nobody helped me get my equipment off stage and into the car. My amp is a combo the size of most 4x12 cabs and is quite heavy.
I usually have multiple guitars for standard tuning and D standard. I run them through an old Vestax effects loop thing so I can use one amp. It works. The Vestax is programmable and I *thought* I had it programmed idiot proof. Some kid stepped on the pedals and changed the programming, unbeknownst to me.
We did Cradle of Filth's version of Temptation (it worked somehow.) Well, when we went to hit the "big chord", no guitar signal. It fell flat on its face. I finally got the thing figured out and we started over but it pretty well sucked.
Another night (the last performance actually), we went up on stage to play the final song for the evening. The stage lights had not come up yet. I went to strap my JP7 on and the strap came off. The JP7 fell on my foot breaking my toe. The drummer kept asking me "do I start yet?" No dude, give me a minute. The guitar was fine. I ended up having to get X rays and the whole bit. I couldn't walk the next day. The other beautiful thing is nobody helped me get my equipment off stage and into the car. My amp is a combo the size of most 4x12 cabs and is quite heavy.
Tim O'Sullivan
Well-known member
I don't think our old mate "The Stoner" posts here any more.
I know this is the "Self Ownage" thread, but this link truly belongs here.
Footage courtesy of Tim O'Sullivan's YouTube channel !
YouTube - The Stoner Plays 'All Right Now'
Ah the famous Offley Bike Show All Right Now Solo! This was one of the other bands on the bill, and the guitarist of this band had a serious operation the day before and was as white as a sheet! He did 6 or so songs and had to leave the stage. They asked me to finish the set, but in a rare state I was too drunk to do it! So the Stoner got up, grabbed the guys Gary Moore Les Paul and finished the set! He did a great job, though this clip does show him in a poor light it must be said!
But that very same gig, we did have a 3 man EBMM Freebird!
